TIME GONE BY

This has been a long tough month. By far one of the busiest here. Time has flown, a month has gone past, and some work has been done. Some learning has happened. My blog has received relatively little attention and all I can find are scraps here and there, interesting bits of information I found here and there. No time to think for myself and generally mull about the state of things. Some sense making needs to happen, when and how, I do not know. Some rest, some time to reflect, relax and wonder about the path one is on and the place where one needs to go.

Learning yes, that's the only thing I can call this past month. A month of learning, a time spent on understanding how to do certain things, how to go about reading, writing, analysing, thinking. Although I can in no way claim to have achieved something great, I have spent this time in working on a few things, some things I like, some I do not like but are still part of my role as a student.

Some changes are in the offing with regard to my current house, and changing home is something that changes one's life in several ways. In ways that I can only anticipate, but cannot express yet, since I have yet to experience the change first hand. For better or for worse, we move on, learning in a whole new way.

That seems to be the only word I can think of right now. 'Learning'. Psychologists say that an experience can be called learning only when it changes our behavior in a significant way. I wouldn't know about the 'significant' part, but yes, this past month has certainly changed the way I relate to my work in a small way. Doing what one likes is never a problem, since one already likes what one does, so its by choice, by volition. Trouble starts when one does not like or has no interest in what one does, and is still supposed to do it as part of one's job. How does one go about doing it then?

This month I had to do something that I had neither the interest nor the expertise to carry it out. But slowly and steadily, I learnt how to go about working on the problem. I spent a lot of time on it, thinking and even dreaming about the problem and the hitches in the project. I spent a lot of time reading up on it and working on several alternate ways of solving it. Eventually I did finish the task I was supposed to do, and I did submit it. And I realized that I still had fun doing it. I was surprised. Since here was a project I didn't like for several reasons. But I still was able to put that aside and come up with a decent output. I have yet to get external feedback for it, but a big part of what one does in life should satisfy us personally, professionally and intellectually. That satisfaction should be enough motivation to carry on. And that is what has happened. That is what I have learnt.

So I think there is something good in everything. Even in things we do not like at first! It's not always Love at first sight, sometimes its a whole lot of work before one can begin to like it. Its the journey that turned out to be fun, irrespective of the destination! :)

Happy learning!